Spotlight

There’s something about that spotlight

I can’t stand

Being placed on a pedestal

Momentarily strokes my ego

Like the brush of a majestic lioness

But that moment quickly fades

And instead I feel

Illuminated by a stark fluorescent light

A spotlight

Unkind

Not like the familiar

Illumination of those on stage

But as though

I am a prisoner

Attempting to escape

Running with

Fear

Adrenaline

Hope and

Courage

Coursing through me

Pulsing through my body

Into every pound

Of my foot hitting the earth

The lift and fall

Of my knees

The alternating swing

Of my arms

That glimmer of hope

That I can make it

But

Then the dreaded spotlight

Switches on

The sirens sing

Alerting all

To come for me

My heart tries to escape my body

In my frozen state

And my hope begins to fall

My courage turns to shame

My adrenaline tries to get me free

But I’m frozen

Trapped

Imprisoned by the fearful attempt

And failure to be set free